I Am The Arch Angel, Do Not Look Directly At Me For My Eyes Are Sensative!

Y'all gotta check this blog out, it's hilarious. It's a daily post of crazy shit that people hear on the streets of NYC. Some of my favorites:

Crazy: So I had to get fillings in all of my teeth.
Passenger: Uh huh.
Crazy: But I figured, why let them do that to me after they drilled holes in my brain, ya know?Passenger: Sure.
Crazy: But I figured, might as well! Although if they were going to fill my teeth, I'd want them to use jelly.
Passenger: Yep.
Crazy: But the guy at the counter said they were out of jelly. So I got a blueberry muffin.
--R Train
Overheard by: Johnny Shizzle

Homey #1: Yo, hold up...Jesus was a virgin?! He went from 12 to 33 with nothing?
Homey #2: Fuck that shit. He definitely got his dick sucked or buttfucked some bitches.
--L Train, 8th Avenue
Overheard by: Brian McCaffrey

Hobo: Hey, any of you fellas got a match?
Drunk guy: Yeah I got a match, my ass and your face!
Hobo: I hear ya.
--3rd Avenue and 9th Street

Yuppie: I don't think he's working now. All he ever talks about is monkeys and robots.
--Mayrose

Fratboy: A dude was walking around the dorm last night cradling a turd.
Chick: Eww! Like a real piece of poop?
Fratboy: Yeah, it was huge, really impresive.
Chick: Oh, that's cool then.
Fratboy: At first I thought it was an otter.
--53rd & 10th
Overheard by: Bob Konkel

Guy on cell: Where am I? I'm always some place watching some crazy shit. I'm watching some motherfuckin' Indian shit, son. Some shit from some country. They're doing a rain dance, son. It's gonna motherfuckin' rain soon. They're doing a motherfuckin' rain dance, son. They're dancing and shit.
--St. Mark's Church
Overheard by: Alex Romanovich

Girl #1: Yo, that girl is nasty. She blew her dog.
Girl #2: No, she didn't. She and her Mamas had sex with Duquan together.
Girl #1: No! Trick! That wasn't her. She blew a dog. I saw it.
Girl #2: She blew Noodles?
--Staten Island Ferry
Overheard by: Anna May M. Abris

Latina: ...and he looks evil and the Princess is saying to him, "You are a good person" and he looks so evil and then she is with Obi King Wasabi and he said he is on the dark side and then the shorty guy--what is his name?--Yoga said, "He is on the dark side" and then Dark Wader he is with the cape and looks all angry and evil reminded me of me on Mondays.
--58th & Lexington
Overheard by: Brandy Rowell

And here's my #1 favorite overheard quote:

Hobo: Does anybody on this bus have change for 36 nickels?
--M60 bus
Overheard by: Oz Skinner